Archive for the business Category

Crowdsourced Absurdity – also Dating Cards: Business Cards for the Celibate

Posted in art and design, business, WTF on September 28, 2010 by absurddelight

Scroll down for a participatory opportunity to wreak some comedic havoc on the bizarre twitter dating scene.

But first a little history and inspiration. Not too too long ago the phrase calling card meant something different. Now that we have phones and internety devices at the ready, the calling card is gone, but it now has a replacement. And its free with your response to an Evite event right now (you might get a cupcake coupon instead).

Better than "What's Your Sign?"

What the hell is a dating card for that a business card can’t achieve, you ask? And who would date someone that has 250 of these? We’d like to know too! Someone, please use these. Please. Order here, and tell us how it goes. Or, if that’s too intensive, help us live out the promise of the card.

The email address and phone number for our dear desperate friend Chad Fulton clearly don’t work, and there is no @chadfulton99 on Twitter.

Well, there WAS no @chadfulton99. But there is now Absurders. If you’d like to follow this intrepid card-carrying love hunter, just head on over to and  check out what he’s up to, and the impressive ladies he’s now following.

Hell, if you want to tweet as Chad and help him get a date, his password is that self-same statement of his date-worthy personality as his dating card subtitle: standupguy

Have fun!

Please do note that Chad’s card says “tweet me” thus indicating his view on twitter terminology.


Buy your dating cards now!

Here’s an equally silly variation on the “dating card” but withouth the bonus of being free, and therefore, even less likely to succeed.

America’s First Legal Gigolo

Posted in business, funny, news and media with tags , , , , , on January 24, 2010 by absurddelight

Via Details

Details Magazine broke some news last week. They had an “exclusive interview” that sparked coverage around the country of a little ranch in Nevada. That salacious scoop was picked up by the AP and spread through venerable CBS, MSNBC, and even staid NPR inciting gleeful web editors all around to chuckle and hit publish on headlines including the word “Prostidude.”  Originality reigns, but that’s not the point here.

The man of the hour goes by “Markus” and he’s using his 15 minutes of fame/ridicule to preach an empowerment gospel, part of a long venerable line of other civil rights heroes.

He is a man is proclaiming his rights for all to hear:

“It’s just the same as when Rosa Parks decided to sit at the front instead of the back. She was proclaiming her rights as a disadvantaged, African-American older woman. And I’m doing the same.”

And promoting empowerment:

“A surrogate lover will love that woman for a whole hour, or however much we charge here, and she’ll leave feeling much more empowered and much more confident in herself.”

Noble work indeed. And if you wonder how one comes to find stable pay for such saintly acts: Continue reading

The Best Avocado Commercial Ever

Posted in business, funny, videos with tags , , , on December 19, 2009 by absurddelight

It’s an oldie but a goodie. Who doesn’t like a surrealist avocado commercial with a bonus shot of a pretty girl in a bikini.

@absurddelight has inside information that this video won first prize in an ad contest, raking in a whopping $2,500 in cold hard check. Not bad eh?

Here are a couple of the avocado entries that lost out: animated business avocados here, falling out of trees. Sadly, the full archive has been lost to the march of time.

Follow @absurddelight

Sprite Bombs and Other Holiday Shopping Deals.

Posted in business, neato, things i like with tags , , , , on December 16, 2009 by absurddelight

Cool Neon is having a 2-for-1 holiday shopping sale on party starting luminescence.

Sprite Bombs

For some unknown reason, these babies are not illegal yet, so get’em while you can! Remember those small, paper wrapped bombs we enjoyed as kids? Well, a whole new generation of instantaneous explosive gratification has arrived!!!

Neon Strobing Sunglasses

New Age Opthamology

The name pretty much explains it: “Clear plastic frames with Cool Neon wire wrapped throughout the inside of the frames.” AA batteries not included.

Remote Control Rainbow Lightbulb

The Clapper 12.0

It has 16 preset colors including bright white at variable brightnesses and can cycle or morph trough all 16color and the 1000’s of colors in between.

Let us know if you buy any of these.

Follow us @absurddelight

Thanks to Alex H. for the tip.

Funny Sign – 99 Cent Store

Posted in business, funny, things i like with tags , , , , on December 4, 2009 by absurddelight

Sometimes signs lie to us. Sometimes they confuse us.

Sometimes they delight us with the effort that went into their permanent broadcast of meaninglessness.

For the record:  There were many items for more than 99¢, and though there were not any for less than 99¢, there were many that were 99¢ less than what we might pay elsewhere so that counts. But some items were, in fact ,99¢.

Follow us @absurddelight

Business Improvement District (a Photo Essay in Two Photos)

Posted in business, funny with tags , , on November 7, 2009 by absurddelight

For this one, let’s start with the close up …

Sad Shopkeeper


Now, this is a camera phone pic, so its a bit blurry, but we assure you, there is no smile on that shopkeeper’s face.

If pressed for an adjective, let’s call him restlessly befuddled.



And here’s why …


The Pains of Progress

A Big Waste of Time? You Decide.

Posted in art and design, business, neato, things to do, videos with tags , , , , , , on July 3, 2009 by absurddelight

OK, this is nuts. We know. But it’s captivating so indulge in some details.

Here’s the worlds largest model train set … apparently one of the biggest tourist destinations in Germany, so forgive us if you’ve already fallen in love with Miniatur Wunderland.

Exactly why is this absurd you ask? Mainly because it exists, but also because of how impressively thorough all the ancillary multimedia, behind the scenes tours, promotional products and business add-ons are. There are hotel and travel packages! Waiting time forecast charts! Good lord this is so German!

Las Vegas

Las Vegas

The projected cost of this alternate reality, when completed in 2014 is … take a guess? €15,000,000! That covers 850,000 work hours from 170 staffers, all carefully documented in weekly reports. More Wunderland in numbers below. But first, a few more pics! Continue reading

New Watermelon Design

Posted in art and design, business, neato, WTF with tags , , , on June 21, 2009 by absurddelight

Here’s another couple pics from the strange fruit file.

The back story is unconfirmed, but it appears to be just another fine example of intrepid boldness in the face of mundane financial obstacles, like unused cubic inches in a shipping container. Stupid conventional watermelons, just don’t stack well.

See below how much easier the labeling is too. Continue reading

From Baldness to Boldness

Posted in accidental art, business, science with tags , , , on June 16, 2009 by absurddelight

Going bald is a drag. And until the big pharma companies muster the resources away from impotence towards hairline recessions, shiney headed men will just have to endure hats and hokey schemes.

And here’s a doozy.

Who exactly is the target audience for this ad?

Tattoo that hairline back into the the crisp fresh-from-the-barber eye catcher it used to be. Convenient and classy, all at once. Details, contact info, and close-up pic below.

Continue reading

Microsoft Does Something Right

Posted in art and design, business, neato with tags , , on June 3, 2009 by absurddelight

Sure it’s an ad, but just imagine walking down your street and seeing that. That’d make our day.

Not that it really makes me want to buy a new OS, but hey, at least they are hiring a creative ad agency now.

Via LikeCool

Twitter the Absurd.

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