Archive for the funny Category

This Baby is Destined for Greatness

Posted in funny, videos with tags on June 4, 2009 by absurddelight

Wow. Now that’s baby talk.

In another time priests would be exorcising demons from this little cutie pie. Instead, we think she’s destined for greatness as a linguist, musician or orator, because, damn, she sure can get a point across even if she doesn’t know a single word.

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Cyber Stalker Outsmarts NBC Reporter

Posted in funny, news and media, videos, WTF with tags , , , , on June 2, 2009 by absurddelight

Admit it, you love it when your local news reporter blindsides some scumbag in his office or home to ask him if he has stopped beating his wife, or some other such question bound to enrage and embarrass the poor criminal.

Well if the scum a) is functionally crazy, and b) works in a costume shop, the formula doesn’t work out so well for the reporter.

My favorite line is “please take off the rabbit head.” And guess what? There’s another mask on underneath.

Best part is that the alleged cyber-stalker gets in a few plugs for her website. On second thought, I think she’s a genius, and not crazy at all.

Here’s the back story:

Cranston police have arrested an alleged cyberstalker. Ann Bruno, a local costume shop owner, is accused of using a computer to harass a competitor. NBC 10s Jim Taricani attempted to question her about it in what turned out to be an unusual interview.”

And, because why not, let’s take this oppportunity to compare this NBC debacle of an interview to the NBC debacle of a series, To Catch a Predator. That’s the horrendous, self-righteous TV show where host Chris Hansen essentially entraps aspiring online child molesters. What would Chris Hansen have done here? Nothing. This is way better programing.

For a good time, listen to some highlights of Catching a Predator excerpted for maximum out of context absurdity.

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Ridiculous Business Cards

Posted in accidental art, funny, neato, videos with tags , , , on May 7, 2009 by absurddelight

We sure hope this is real.

THESE business cards have two ingredients: MEAT AND LASERS.

"THESE business cards have two ingredients: MEAT AND LASERS."

Meet  the Meat Card. Good for networking and snacking, also offending vegetarians.

MEAT CARDS do not fit in a Rolodex, because their deliciousness CANNOT BE CONTAINED in a Rolodex …Unlike other business cards, MEAT CARDS will retain value after the econopocalypse. Hoard and barter your calorie-rich, life-sustaining cards.

Buy them here. Or leave a comment on what you think of promoting your business through beef jerky.

Below are some other absurd business card moments and ideas to get your self-promotional juices flowing.

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Twister Meets the Joy of Sex

Posted in art and design, business, funny, games etc with tags , , on April 29, 2009 by absurddelight

Using red satin sheets says something about you. This is a dignified blog, so we won’t spell it out for you. But using the Karma Sheetra says roughly the same thing about you, but without any of the maturity or class.

Position 7 is our favorite.

Position 7 is our favorite.

You can vote for your favorite Karma Sheetra position here. Or just watch the infomercial.

Those Brits. So cheeky.

Link. (buy your own set for just £19.99)

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Drunk Texting Compilation

Posted in funny, open letters, things i like with tags , , , on April 28, 2009 by absurddelight

Drunk dialing is fun … to hear about later. But it’s just not the ideal format to relish on a lazy blog like this one.

Luckily, some more ambitious web addicts have put together a fine compilation of presumably real drunk text messages.

They’re organized by zip code, though that really doesn’t matter. What matters is how cell phone keypads somehow induce these people to spew the most embarrassing confessionals. Also, how lucky we, the blog readers, are that some people instinctively turn to text messaging when faced with an absurd predicament.

Scrolling through the archives is like a random sampling of American bad decisions, short term regret, and foolish bragging.

Here are some of our favorites:

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Pray, Explain This Picture

Posted in funny, open letters with tags , , , on April 21, 2009 by absurddelight

So this is a great conceptual pic, right? Now try and guess what it’s for?

Give up?

A prayer website. And a pretty engaging one at that.

Dear God lets anyone, worshiping any God, write in with a pithy (or rambling) letter to God. Then they’ll post the “best” under a seemingly visually striking photograph that allegedly relates to the existential plight in the letter. Really it’s just a cool photo site with yammering words you ignore most of the time. Categories include Sex (funny pic there), Work, Belief, and others, including the category for the pic above, Dreams.

This head shopper is upset about the pointlessness of corporate life or something or other.

Link.

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“Hello, 911? I’m Locked in My Car and I’m Stupid”

Posted in funny, WTF with tags , , on April 20, 2009 by absurddelight

Audio only. But it’s short and it’s worth it. This terribly uniformed woman calls 911 because she doesn’t know how to unlock her car door from the inside.

Really, the dispatcher is quite nice about the whole thing.

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