Best Spam Ever – part 1

Here’s the most entertaining Nigerian/419 scam email I’ve ever gotten. The best parts are in blue, links in orange as usual:

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rodsmith1@adinet.com.uy Thu, Mar 26, 2009 at 8:00 AM

Reply-To: Infousmoneylaundary@mail2webmaster.com

United Nation
Money Laundering Association
256 East 45th Street,
London, NY 10025-6745.

Email: Infousmoneylaundary@mail2webmaster.com

Attention :::::::::::: Sir,

I am Mr. Rod Smith, a secretary from United Nation Money laundering Association here in London. We discovered that you needed a financial help and support to achieve your goals for establishing goods Business opoortunities like building of Factories, Estates, Hospitals or more other business opportunities that can yield much money here in europe.

Here is the door open for you for laundering to any amount of money that you needed or desire to achieve your goals and expectations, because our main motives and aim is to make less priviledge and the rich once becomes more successful in life.

We will offer you any rate or any amount of your desire but our least and maximum laundering is from the sum of 500,000, to 100,000,000,00 Dollars, Euro or Pounds, and our percentage commission is 15% commission after 18 months of laundering.

So try as much as posible to visit us directly at our company email contact with your personal details like your International Passport/Driving Licence, country/Address and your Mobile/Fax Number.

Best Regards,
Mr. Rod Smith.
Secretary general.

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By now this kind of email is prehistoric news, but this was was special for the combination of the incredibly unbelievable location, the gratuitous invocation of the United Nations and the bold request for so much information.

Read more to see what we sent back to him, and the subsequent email chain.

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Dear Mr. Smith,

I was very glad to receive your message.  As it turns out, I have a great need for money laundering, as I have large amounts of unaccounted cash that I acquired through my child prostitution business.  Can you please give me more information about your laundering methods?

If all goes well, I will send you $5,000 USD as an initial run.  If that works out, I have an additional $26,000,000 USD which will need to be laundered.  Your 15% commission sounds appropriate.  In your reply, please let me know if I should send the money to the London, NY address you listed below.

Best regards,
Jarod Bingham

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Well that got him hooked.

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From: rodsmith1@adinet.com.uy <rodsmith1@adinet.com.uy>
Subject: Re: Attention :::::::::::: Mr. Jarod Bingham
To:
Date: Thursday, March 26, 2009, 8:47 PM

ATTN: Mr. Jarod Bingham,

We are glad to receive your mail which has been fully noted by the organisation.

Meanwhile be informed that our organisation and our method of laundering has the rules that governed it, we don’t do things any how to avoid making some silly mistakes.

Now regarding your mail which elaborated your interest for Money laundering from the organisation, however if you want to Apply or take a Laundering,you shall first of all give us your Full Name, your Internation Passport / Driving
Licence, Your Province/Country, Home Address & finally your Phone/Fax Number,
and the Amount of Money you which you desire or wish take for Laundering, these
informations shall be summited  to organisation mail box for approvals.

Secondly, after receiving the stated informations from next other step is to Apply or take a Laundering Application Registration Form [pic here] and our Laundering Agreement Form which you shall fill, sign it and send back to us via email with the sum of US $525, which you shall pay to receive the both Forms.

Which after this comfirmation of your interest for Money Laundering we shall invite you to our company, and para-venture you can’t make it to come or vist our company, we shall make every neccessary arrangement with our Diplomatic
Agency who shall bring or arrive to your country with the funds as a consignment.

So kindly notify the specific amount you needed for laundering and summit it together with the information stated above direct to the companies address.

Thanks alot for your understanding, hoping to receive your responds soonest.

Best regards,

Mr. Rod Smith
Secretary general.
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Had we been as dedicated as these 419 scam vigilantes we might have taken another course, but we only have so much time here at Absurd Delight, so …

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Dear Mr. Smith,

I see you are a very astute business man and I am very much looking forward to our joint para-venture.  Here is my information, please provide me with the official Laundering Application Registration Form and the address to which I should submit it.

Full Name:
Jarod Lester Bingham

Passport #:
67534255 (USA)

Driving License:
YAW3832 (Rhode Island)

Country:
USA

Home Address:
784 Sillypants Way
Nutter Butter City, New York

Fax Number:
(810) 277-2934

Amount of Money:
$26,000,000 USD

Finally, I travel frequently to London, NY and would love to meet you for lunch or a brief meeting.  If you would please let me know your shoe size, I will bring along some of the adorable loafers that my slaves make in the basement during their “free time.”   I’m sure a man of your stature would appreciate their fine quality and comfort.

I look forward to your reply.

Sincerely,
Sir Jarod Bingham

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Lest you think snark and sarcasm would tip off of scammer (or posting it verbatim here), there is more. And it just gets more absurd. Tune in tomorrow for the rest.

BONUS: This American Life did a wonderful piece on scamming the scammers. Listen to it here. It actually almost, but not quite, makes you feel sorry for the scammer who gets so horribly scammed back.

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